Nothing to do with Charlize Theron or Bob Dylan.

Location: Norwich, United Kingdom

Keep on Truckin'.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Mad Dogs and Englishmen

I realised when I saw this photo that the Sun makes us all go a little cuckoo in this country. Personally, I wouldn't blame anyone for clutching their children a little closer at that smile; "Now listen, Johnny, when Mummy and Daddy said not to look strange people in the eye, that is who we meant" etc etc. As for James, he looks like a disillusioned football hooligan who has just realised the only plastic garden chair he has to throw is the one he's sitting on; "And my Adnams is going to get spilt, too."

Today, I saw no Mad-Dogs wandering about in the heat (unless you count that frisky Doberman with the oversized testes) but I saw plenty of Englishmen, heading off the afternoon in a wave of emaciated, gangrenously inked and milky-white stomachs, leaning out of lorries and beeping at me because my sallow, stick-like calves were no longer swathed in wool, but in a pair of knee-length shorts. Quel miracle!

By 4pm, people were starting to redden and the air filled with tear-inducing smoke because of a city-wide epidemic of shiny new barbeque metal and lighter fluid. I remembered that my Dad used to light ours by shoving a wand of old newspaper into the toaster and then running his rudimentary splint out into the garden as it went up like a polyester sofa in his charred hands.

Personally, I think Mad-Dogs and Englishmen are one in the same when it comes to the heat, but then I also thought it was possible to use a hole-punch to er, punch holes in my hair. Oh, and before you ask, the standards of our beloved universities are categorically not slipping.


Anonymous Monkey said...

It always amuses me how the british complain about not having sun and then complain that its too hot after sittng out in it for 6 hours. I guess well never learn. Now im going to have no blogs to read as Jo & Roo have discovered this fair shore again and everyone else is busy revising. GL with your exams George.

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Jo said...

Monkey and George. Sittin' in a tree. Mwa ha ha...

5:41 PM  
Blogger Georgina said...

Oh, I did miss you, Jo.

5:45 PM  

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